Old memories returned while I was trying to learn finnish and found a note, furthermore a letter.
I wrote this letter and never had the chance to send it. But I think it was actually a good one and I simply missed the moment for it.
"For YOU."
"Actually I really don't know how to start. I would love to say this to you in person. Moreover I don't like those kind of letters. It doesn't matter what is tried to be said, it always sounds...weird. Maybe because of fear.
And if this thing on that day would not have happened I am pretty sure this letter would not even exist.
I was so happy to see you., even I didn't want that special thing for that. And I am sorry I didn't react to you in the right way. I was just too surprised.
It is by the way one year ago since we've met the first time. And no I didn't stare at you for another reason than being you as you stood there. You have been standing there at this normal usual place and just coincidently watched into my eyes at the same time I did. I knew immediately that I like you.
But other things have never really mattered to me. The only important thing to know is that I really *do* like you.
I like you because or since the first time we've met and I'd love to talk to you.
But I can't, it is simply not possible."
I should have been sent it. I could have taken the risk. I knew that signs were not too bad those times. Even if it never had worked out the way I wanted it to be. I should have let him know how I feel.
But I was scared and I am still asking myself how his answer would have been.
In a way it is good it never happened. But it was important and still is. Because I learned that those things can happen. Love at first sight. Sometimes the fate leads two persons together but what they are doing out of it, how it evolves. It's up to ourselves. And it is true we missed it. In a way I pity it. But despite of I think it was a good thing and I don't want to forget it. It makes me thankful for what I have now. This Love. It helped me grow and it kinda motivated me also to come here. Not the main reason just one out of a million. Anyway definitely one out of my heart's bottom in the past. And I value it.
Even it's gone long ago.
I wrote this letter and never had the chance to send it. But I think it was actually a good one and I simply missed the moment for it.
"For YOU."
"Actually I really don't know how to start. I would love to say this to you in person. Moreover I don't like those kind of letters. It doesn't matter what is tried to be said, it always sounds...weird. Maybe because of fear.
And if this thing on that day would not have happened I am pretty sure this letter would not even exist.
I was so happy to see you., even I didn't want that special thing for that. And I am sorry I didn't react to you in the right way. I was just too surprised.
It is by the way one year ago since we've met the first time. And no I didn't stare at you for another reason than being you as you stood there. You have been standing there at this normal usual place and just coincidently watched into my eyes at the same time I did. I knew immediately that I like you.
But other things have never really mattered to me. The only important thing to know is that I really *do* like you.
I like you because or since the first time we've met and I'd love to talk to you.
But I can't, it is simply not possible."
I should have been sent it. I could have taken the risk. I knew that signs were not too bad those times. Even if it never had worked out the way I wanted it to be. I should have let him know how I feel.
But I was scared and I am still asking myself how his answer would have been.
In a way it is good it never happened. But it was important and still is. Because I learned that those things can happen. Love at first sight. Sometimes the fate leads two persons together but what they are doing out of it, how it evolves. It's up to ourselves. And it is true we missed it. In a way I pity it. But despite of I think it was a good thing and I don't want to forget it. It makes me thankful for what I have now. This Love. It helped me grow and it kinda motivated me also to come here. Not the main reason just one out of a million. Anyway definitely one out of my heart's bottom in the past. And I value it.
Even it's gone long ago.
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